It is work, plain and simple.
Choices, not just the easy shit,
Define your day, even who you are.
“It’s up to me, but am I up to it?”
I wake each day girded for battle
Learning new habits and new skills,
Firing mantras and stabbing pen to journal,
Even running hourly meditation drills.
I feel great and terrible forces in my chest
Fighting for the battleground of my heart
Hate and fear burning everything down,
Love building back what was torn apart.
Each day holds moments to improve, or don’t.
Choices I have made without proper thought.
Actions I have taken ignoring the “Platinum Rule”
But when it all goes south (LOL), I still react with shock.
I win most days, most hours, most moments…
But when I lose my fight and surrender to the beast
I cause harm and hurt to those I love most, but
What I’m really saying loudest is “I love me the least.”
When I am present to my life, to my purpose, to my people
I find divine, brief moments of peace which far outshine all loss.
Moments when I forgive ME my failures, my losses, my humanity,
Make me able to love, to accept and to help all whose paths I cross.