Always

My knees are hurting,

My patience is short,

My words come out different

Than I mean in my head.

The mistakes I make

Aren’t because I don’t

Want to change my life.

I have to stop hurting.

These traumas I carry

I’ve shouldered them so long

I don’t know if I remember

How to put the load down.

When I get this way, so lost in pain,

I can see the hurt in your eyes.

The damage and pain hiding

Behind your concern for me.

Always wondering what you did,

Always afraid of making it worse,

Always fearful of the wrath that is

Always never because of you.